Rant: Single Men Should Take Zumba and Here’s Why…
Living in Shanghai can be an amazing experience but here is one complaint: As a single foreign woman living in here, it can be quite difficult to meet people to date seriously. This doesn’t count going on Tinder or Bumble, which we all know is where we get bombarded with requests for sex (#realitiesofsingledom). If that’s the case, then it’s SUPER easy. On the other side, my single male or male identifying friends who like women that have the same issues. They complain the girls only want to hook-up or they don’t meet the right kind of woman who share their values.
Also, I understand that when it comes to meeting people in bars and clubs, it can be daunting on both sides: Women dress up and make sure they’re looking their absolute hottest just so someone can approach them. They see someone attractive and they try to get their attention by flipping their hair, smiling for .5 seconds and then get frustrated when homie doesn’t approach. These dudes see these insanely attractive women and get intimidated and don’t approach at all because of the fear of their ego being crushed.
But, what if there was a situation where everyone could get together in a place where there was no pressure? Just a place where you go to have a good time and all the benefits of that good time lead you to meeting some cool people? For my jiu-jitsu people, you might automatically be thinking “c’mon that the bjj gym! Of course” And yes of course anywhere where there are awesome people coming together and doing something they love is a great place.
But, I want to advocate for my other fitness love, the answer to all the being able to meet people in a less intimidating way: men going to activities where there are women aka a ZUMBA CLASS!!!!!
I know this seems quite silly and if you’re reading this, you’re probably thinking that I’m being extra or asking yourself why would I embarrass myself in a Zumba class and dance around? But, let me give you a bit of perspective here.
Note: This article is directed towards the single men or masculine identifying people who maybe are trying to meet more people. Doesn’t have to be for dating but you never know who you meet when you put yourself in a different situation.
Every time I ask my male friends to come to a Zumba class with me, they always tell me that they will be judged by their friends and the other people in the room… those people in the room who happen to mostly be women. For those men who are hyper-sensitive or a little bit concerned about people questioning their sexuality, the concern is that “people will think I’m gay blah blah!"
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For those guys who concerned about people looking at you or people questioning your sexuality: WHO THE F CARES?! First off, the people who are coming there are there because they want to get their own workout in and have their own fun. They aren’t worried about you. Also, those people who make fun of you for dancing are just haters who try to bring other people down and maybe doesn’t have the gall for themselves to try a Zumba class. In addition, every time a man enters the room, all the ladies are gathering themselves together and adjusting their posture to make sure they look nice in some way. I can’t describe it through writing but it’s really funny to see some chick talking to her friend and getting a glimpse of a guy walking into the room and all of a sudden popping her booty and making “the girls” sit up right.
Once you get over yourself, the instructor introduces themselves and the music starts, you’re either concentrating on the steps or feeling the vibes of the class (or at least you should be). If you can’t get into the rhythm of the music, you should be trying to just sweat as much as you can so you start to feel the workout benefits. If you keep going back to the class (which is the way you start to get to know everyone) eventually, you get used to the playlist and the instructors of style of teaching so you can just kind of step back and go through the motions.
As you do that, take a look around you (not in a pervy way, but still) everyone is having a good time, everyone is enjoying themselves, everyone is feeling confident and there is something about people just moving their bodies. There are so many people of different shape, sizes, colors, personalities, etc. etc. you can always be around the kind of people you like to look at and get to know. Before the class and in between songs, giving your neighbor a high five or just making small talk is a great way to build up some confidence to talk to the mostly women in the class. From the other side, I think everyone loves someone with a lot of confidence (I need to realize this for myself but I’m not talking about me right now). And if you can cut a rug and really boogie then the ladies are really going to be intrigued and you’ll catch an eye or two.
For the people who go to the bar or some club, how many times have you felt awkward or weird trying to talk to someone. Maybe you’re smoother than most but I think that some people aren’t the best at these kinds of social situations. Also, some people need to be insanely drunk or some people are just out as late as they can find someone to go home with. These habits aren’t the healthiest ones, especially if you’re doing them every weekend (no shade or judgements it’s just facts).
Coming to a Zumba class gives you a new way to meet people naturally. People are always talking to each other and trying to get to know each other. I mean yea you can think about the other parts (meeting people outside of the class for a drink) but in the end you can meet a new person. Also for those of you that like to workout, and tend to do shy away from dance cardio or group exercise, your body won’t anticipate the change in doing something different.
But anyway, this is just my opinion for those of you who don’t want to think outside of the box and have one idea of what Zumba is like. Yes, dancing is associated with being more feminine. Sure, sometimes you look silly doing it. Definitely, some people have their opinions of what Zumba is like and blah, blah, blah. But, if you’re one of those people who want to try something new, tired of doing the same stuff over and over, and want to give yourself an opportunity to meet someone new, be it a significant other or a new friends, come try a Zumba class. Okay, rant over.
Question for y’all: What other different ways have you thought of meeting someone new?